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Dharma Talks
given at Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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2024-01-14
Metta Practice with Difficulties and Challenges: Metta for the Difficult Person, Practicing with the Judgmental Mind, and Forgiveness
63:41
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Donald Rothberg
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We begin by exploring the nature of some of the challenges of metta practice, including with difficult emotions, body-states, and thoughts, and how to practice when these challenges arise. The spirit is that of understanding challenges as part of the path of learning. We then focus on one way of deliberating bring metta practice to a challenging situation, through metta with the difficult person, followed by an account of one particular challenge, the “judgmental mind,” its nature and how to practice with it; this includes a short selection from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.s’ sermon, “On Judging.” Lastly, there is an introduction to forgiveness practice.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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January Metta 2024
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2023-12-20
The Dharma in Times of Crisis
1:20:00
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Donald Rothberg,
Stephen Fulder
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Stephen Fulder, the founder and senior teacher of Tovana (the Israel Insight Society), is in conversation with Donald Rothberg. We hold the understanding of "crisis" broadly, remembering that we are in the midst of multiple crises, while giving more attention to Israel/Palestine. Such crises are a major challenge to our dharma practice. In this context, we explore a number of different themes, including bringing our practice to difficult experiences that often arise in a crisis, such as fear, emotional pain, reactivity, numbness, and the presence of repetitive negative narratives and views. We also identify, during the conversation, a number of resources, including qualities of compassion, empathy, equanimity, and the importance of finding a "refuge"and deep support in different ways. The conversation is followed by discussion, and a closing guided meditation.
[During the conversation, we see a short (3:28) video of Tovana teachers speaking a sentence each about the current crisis, in Hebrew, with English sub-titles. The video can be seen at https://youtu.be/NqKoCm2TMhA?feature=shared.]
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2023-11-22
Practicing with Conflict: Foundations 3
66:27
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Donald Rothberg
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We start by reviewing briefly the two times' accounts of the foundations for practicing with differences and conflicts, first giving a definition of "conflict" as a difference of values, goals, or strategies, and not necessarily involving hostility or aggression. There's an invitation to focus on a conflict in one's life that is in the moderate range of difficulty, and bring this to mind as we work with ten foundations of skillful practice with conflict.
We look again briefly at the multiple reasons why bringing our practice to conflicts is often difficult, and then review the more "inner" four foundations of skillful practice with conflict (1-4). We then bring in six further foundations which are more "outer," including (5) developing guidelines and agreements, especially in groups or organizations, but also with individuals; (6) clarifying a vision of a "win-win" or "both-and" approach to conflicts that meet the underlying interests or needs of all concerned; and (7) developing empathy. We offer two brief empathy practices, including one done in the context of one's own conflict. Three further foundations are offered: (8) grounding in Buddhist ethics, particularly the precepts and the understanding that one should bring care and kindness to all, and that all have Buddha Nature; (9) skillful speech (part of ethical training); and (10) the bringing of these ethical dimensions into collective life, through nonviolent action and the concept, in Dr. King's work, of the beloved community. After the talk, there is a discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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Attached Files:
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Johan Galtung's Win-Win Model of Conflict Transformation
by Donald Rothberg
(PDF)
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Feelings Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Needs Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Empathy Map
by Donald Rothberg/Oren Jay Sofer
(PDF)
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