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Dharma Talks
given at Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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2023-10-25
Practicing with Conflict: Foundations 2
68:46
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Donald Rothberg
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We start by reviewing last week's initial account of the foundations for practicing with differences and conflicts, first giving a definition of "conflict" as a difference of values, goals, or strategies, and not necessarily involving hostility or aggression. We also look again briefly at the multiple reasons why bringing our practice to conflicts is often difficult, and then review the more "inner" four foundations of skillful practice with conflict. We then bring in three further foundations which are more "outer": developing guidelines and agreements, especially in groups or organizations, but also with individuals; clarifying a vision of a "win-win" or "both-and" approach to conflicts that meet the underlying interests or needs of all concerned; and developing empathy. After the talk, there is a discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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Attached Files:
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Johan Galtung's Win-Win Model of Conflict Transformation
by Donald Rothberg
(PDF)
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Feelings Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Needs Inventory from NVC
by NVC (added by Donald Rothberg)
(PDF)
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Empathy Map
by Donald Rothberg/Oren Jay Sofer
(PDF)
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2023-10-18
Practicing with Conflict: Foundations 1
66:41
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Donald Rothberg
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We begin by identifying the importance of developing skillful practice with differences and conflicts, whether inner conflicts or interpersonal conflicts or group or organizational conflicts or social or international conflicts. The claim is that the general principles and practices are fundamentally the same, even as the practices take different forms when there are more complexities.
We first give a definition of "conflict" as a difference of values, goals, or strategies, and as not necessarily involving hostility or aggression. This definition may help to go against the prevalence of negative conditioning about conflicts; we look at a number of reasons why bringing our practice to conflicts is commonly difficult. For the rest of the talk, we examine four more "inner" foundations of skillful practice with conflict: examining our own conditioning; working with the core relevant teachings of the Buddha, particularly about the nature of reactivity (as in the teaching of the Two Arrows); practicing with difficult emotions, body states, and thoughts; and bringing in the heart practices. After the talk, there is a discussion.
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Monday and Wednesday Talks
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2023-10-14
Upekkha - Abiding in Equanimity
37:17
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Devon Hase
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Teaching and guided meditation on the practice of equanimity.
From Ruth King:
”Equanimity can feel internally like a great mountain, with the mind solid and stable, undisturbed by the changing seasons. Or it can be like the ocean, with the mind vast, deep, and immeasurable, undisturbed by whatever swims, floats, or is housed in its waters. Equanimity can be like a strong fire — roaring, engulfing, and transmuting, undisturbed by whatever is thrown into it. Or like immense space — open, allowing, and receiving, undisturbed by the objects that arise and pass away”
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Spirit Rock Meditation Center
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Fall Insight 2023
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